Interrupt Jokes

What do you call a president who interrupts people?

Donald Tr- WRONG!

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Why did the interrupting cow cross the road?

MOOOOOO!!!!

How do you interrupt a vegans dinner?

Just turn on the sprinkler.

How do you get your wife to listen to every word without interrupting?

Talk in your sleep.

How do you interrupt a Redditor's winning streak?

The Game

Why does the CPU never get any work done?

Because it gets interrupted constantly.

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Text Jokes More Text Jokes

What state has the highest cell phone bills?

Text-us

When people on Facebook say they lost their phone and need everyone's numbers again, I text them: "Guess who?

For 2 weeks.

Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why do composers win debates?

Because when their opponent makes a point, they always respond with a valid counterpoint.

Why can't America ever win a chess tournament?

Because they're missing two towers

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's stronger, fifty watts of sound or fifty watts of light?

I don't care but would you please stop screaming, turning the lights on and off.

Why do receipts need to be 75 feet long?

I reach into my pocket thinking I have a wad of cash, turns out I just bought a soda earlier.

People Jokes More People Jokes

What is wrong with people?

Have they never had pizza

What did King Midas say to get peoples attention?

Eh you!!

Road Jokes More Road Jokes

Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in the mud, and crossed the road again?

Because he was a dirty double-crosser!

Why did the Chili Pepper cross the road?

To get to the Otherside!

Evolve Jokes More Evolve Jokes

Why did the t-rex cross the road?

Because the chicken hadn't evolved yet.

What do you call it when an Eevee (Pokemon) evolves into what you want with no interruptions?

DirecTV (Say it aloud)

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why didn't the dog want to go into outer space?

Because he was scared of vacuums!

What is irony?

When the last person you want to see is the last person you see.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What was James Bond after he slept through an earthquake?

Shaken, not stirred.

Why did the engineer buy a mattress?

To sleep under it