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How do you sell a dog to someone hard of hearing?

Get really close to their ear and shout, "DO YOU WANNA BUY A DOG "

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Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

How do you make a dog go meow?

Freeze it and run it through a bandsaw. MEEEOWW!!

What's gray and all around?

Everything. I'm a dog.

Sell Jokes More Sell Jokes

What do you call a factory that sells passable products?

A satisfactory

Why can't Democrats sell pants?

They believe in a single-pair system.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

What happened when Sean Connery bought himself a little kitten?

The cat shat on the mat.

What did the teacher say after spending thousands in the expensive hotel?

I'm sorry to leave now that I've almost bought the place.

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

Which of my girlfriends do you think is the prettiest?

What I actually heard was "Do you want a fight "

Why didn't Wilma let Fred in when he was banging at the door?

Because she was in the shower and didn't hear him because the elephant stump was on full blast.

Ear Jokes More Ear Jokes

How do you make a blondes eyes shine bright?

Shine a torch in her ear!

What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?

Trying to hold on to a thought.

Wanna Jokes More Wanna Jokes

What did one train track say to the opposite track?

Wanna race?

How did the pothead propose to his girlfriend?

Marriage.. you wanna?

Shout Jokes More Shout Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

What did the soccer player shout to the baker who's cakes kept sticking to the tin?

LINE IT!