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How is Michael Jackson like the thousands of people outside Times Square on New Year's?

Once the balls drop, They're no longer interested!

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call people who use the pull-out method?

Mom and Dad.

What's the similarity between pessimists and people with a phobia of sausages?

They both fear the wurst

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

How many members of the coalition does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"We are not prepared to comment on specific numbers at this time."

What is the creepiest letter of the alphabet?

V. Because no matter where you are, any time of any day, no matter what you do, V always follows U.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

What do you get if you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat miner

Why did the black guy get mad at the pirate?

He dropped the hard 'arrrrrr.'

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

How did I get the balls to write such a grotesque joke?

Gruesome.

Why did the football team sack the hairy goalkeeper?

Because he rarely shaved the balls.

Michael Jackson Jokes More Michael Jackson Jokes

Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 20 years?

Michael Jackson

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Andrew Jackson?

One goes from black to white, the other goes from white to black.

Thousand Jokes More Thousand Jokes

Why didn't the sun have to attend university?

It's already got thousands of degrees.

What's the difference between a Blues musician and a Jazz musician?

A blues musician plays 3 chords to audiences of thousands. A jazz musician plays thousands of chords to audiences of 3

New Year Jokes More New Year Jokes

How does Times Square start the new year?

By having Mariah Carey drop the ball! "The audience can sing this one."

Why did the raisin take the prune to the New Year's ball?

Because he couldn't find a date!