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Ball Jokes

What did the elephant say?

What did the elephant say when it was pulled out of a pit by the Balls? Thank you Mr. And Mrs. Ball!

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Why did the Tinman not go to the ball?

His heart wasn't in it.

What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?

Guurrhggrgrh

What's the difference between Elton John's chin and Tiger Woods?

Tiger Woods hasn't hit as many balls.

What's hit more balls than David Beckham's right foot?

Elton John's chin.

What does it mean if a dude looks down and sees four balls instead of two?

He needs to be very careful, because he may be getting screwed.

Why does Cinderella never win the Olympics?

She has a pumpkin for a coach and runs away from the ball.

What would Game of Thrones be called if it was about ice cream?

Game of Cones If it was about sword sharpening: Game of Hones If it was just everyone playing Go: Game of Stones If everyone was single: Game of Alones If it was about balls: Game of Throwns If it was about spooky scary skeletons: Game of Bones If everyone used UAVs to fight: Game of Drones If everyone was a banker: Game of Loans If it was about breakfast foods: Game of Scones

What's the best part about Dragon Ball Z?

Find out in the next episode of Dragon! Ball! Z!

Why the story tells that Cindarella was at the ball?

Because the censor erased the letter "s".

Why was Cinderella kicked out of the football team?

She ran away from the ball.

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What did Cinderella do when she reached the ball?

She choked.

What do you call a dachshund with no hind legs and balls of steel?

Sparky.

Why don't women wear skirts in San Fransisco?

Because their balls would show.

Why was Cinderella kicked off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball

What slides in and out until it's balls are busted?

Piston

What does Belathor call his balls?

His treasures.

Why didn't Cinderella makes the Soccer Team?

She kept running away from the ball

Whats bigger than your balls?

The moon

What do you call a foot doctor, curled up in a ball on the floor?

A pedal physician in the fetal position.

Why can't Cinderella play soccer?

Because she keeps running away from the ball

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes
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What do you call a mouse with no balls?

Optical.

What is Long, has two balls and you lift it?

A dumbell

What do you call a dog with no hind legs and balls of steel?

Sparky

Why do sumo wrestlers shave their balls?

So they don't have hairballs!

Why was the Narwhal kicked off the volleyball team?

He was always spiking the ball.

What do you do with an elephant with three balls?

Walk him and pitch to the rhino.

What's the difference between Tom Brady and Ben Roethlisberger?

Tom wants his balls illegally deflated on the field and Ben wants that off the field.

What's the most sought after ball in Biopsy Bingo?

B9

Why are dogs in a lot of pain?

Because they chew balls.

Why was Cinderella kicked off the basketball team?

She kept running away from the ball

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What has six balls and screws everybody?

The lottery.

How do you make a pool table laugh?

Jiggle its balls

Why did the dog keep dropping his ball?

He had barkinsons disease.

Why did the football team sack the hairy goalkeeper?

Because he rarely shaved the balls.

What's got a pair of balls and 100 teeth?

A crocodile Q: what's got a 100 balls and a pair of teeth? A: A singing choir of army veterans

Why does a dog lick it's balls?

Because they're delicious. What? You've never tried them? You're missing out.

Why didn't the Seahawks give the ball to Marshawn Lynch?

They couldn't fined him.

What is the difference between the deflate gate controversy and my wife?

Only one shows an interest in the balls.

How do you make a snooker table laugh?

Put your hands in its pockets & tickle its balls.

What did the angry dough ball say to the other dough ball?

You trying to get a rise out of me! Came up with while I was making pizza.

What happened to the cant when it ate a ball of wool?

What happened to the cat when it ate a ball of wool? It had mittens

How do you tell a domesticated cat from a wild one?

The domesticated doesnt have balls

How many balls does Fred have?

10

What did Dr. Frankenstein say when his monster showed up for the ball?

You look quite put-together this evening.

Why did the elephant paint his balls green?

To hide in avocado trees.. How did Tarzan die? Answer: Picking avocados

What Do you Call a Bowler that drops his ball a lot?

Gutterfingers!

What do The Pope & a Christmas Tree have in common?

The balls are just for decoration.

Why did the elephant paint his balls red?

What makes the loudest noise in the jungle?

How do u get a pool table to laugh?

Tickle its balls.

What did Cinderella say when she reached the ball?

Nothing, she just made gagging noises

What do riding a bike and playing basketball have in common?

If you're not careful, you can pop a ball.

How do you tell if someone's balls are sensitive?

Give them a test-tickle

What did Cindarella say when she got to the ball?

Gluk gluk gluk (say it out loud)

What do you do to an elephant with three balls?

Walk him, and pitch to the giraffe!

Why wasn't the pediatrician impressed with the New Year's Eve Times Square ball drop?

Because he has seen plenty of balls drop. (Sorry)

What happened to the baseball played who was unfaithful to his wife?

He was thrown out at home. - His two balls got a strike.

Why doesnt Nickelback play football?

Because even if they had 4 players they still couldnt throw a ball.

What do you call a dog with no legs and balls of steal?

Sparkie.

What has one hundred balls and screws old ladies?

Bingo.

What do a wicked stepmother and a gag reflex have in common?

They both keep you from getting to the ball!

What did one strand of yarn say to the other?

I'm not ready to dye, I still have a few ends to tie up. "Ball up..."

What goes "ha ha, thump thump?

A guy laughing his balls off.

What do you do meet an old friend?

What do you do when someone throws a ball What do you put on a hamburger What do you find in a litter box

Who's there! Astor! Astor who?

Astor the ball is over!

What would Caitlyn Jenner need to do if she changed her mind about being a woman?

She would need to reJennerate some balls. What does Caitlyn Jenner do before she goes out Bruce's up for the evening.

What happens when skin touches skin, hair touches hair, and Balls Disappear?

You Blink Your Eyes.

What does Cinderella say when she gets to the ball?

Cough* *cough*

Why is a pool table green?

Well you'd be green too if someone racked your balls.

Why did the toilet make a joke about the balls?

It was low hanging fruit.

How did I get the balls to write such a grotesque joke?

Gruesome.

Why didn't the shy juggler perform at the circus today?

Because he didn't have the balls!

Why did Cinderella get kicked off the Basketball team?

Cause she ran away from the ball

What Happened when the girl sat on Lance Armstrong's lap?

She had a ball

What do you call balls on the wall?

Walnuts. What do you call balls on a chest Chestnuts. What do you call balls on a chin My throne

Why did the blonde give up bowling for screwing?

The balls are lighter and you don't have to change shoes.

How do you hide a elephant in a cherry tree?

Paint it's balls red. Howed Tarzan die Picking cherries.

Why couldn't Cinderella play soccer?

She always ran away from the ball

Why don't snakes have balls?

Because hardly any of them know how to dance.

How do you shave your balls?

After thinking for a few moments I say "Carefully"

What do you call a dog that has balls of steel and is dragging them across cement?

Sparky.

Why did Cinderella get kicked off for the soccer team?

She kept running from the ball.

How does Times Square start the new year?

By having Mariah Carey drop the ball! "The audience can sing this one."

Why did Cinderella get kicked off the softball team?

Because she ran away from the ball!

How is Michael Jackson like the thousands of people outside Times Square on New Year's?

Once the balls drop, They're no longer interested!

Who won the race between two balls of string?

They we're tied!

Why did Cinderella get kicked off her soccer team?

She kept running away from the ball.

Why does Superman have balls of steel?

I wouldn't know, i don't know the canon that well

What do you call it when your balls are in the street?

It's Cul de sac!

Why didn't the girl go into the haunted house?

She didn't have the balls.

Why don't girls like playing dodgeball?

Because we don't like getting hit by balls. 12: *giggles for 5 minutes* You are so my child

What do you call people pretending to be a ball?

Roll playing im sry

What do a Christmas tree and a sterile man have in common?

Their balls are for decoration only.

How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden?

Hide the ball it drives them nuts!

How does a elephant hide in the jungle?

2.What is the Loudest sound in the jungle 1.Paints its balls red and climbs up a apple tree. 2.Tarzan picking apples.

Why did the operation Barbarossa fail?

The supreme commander didn't have the balls required.

Why was Cinderella banned from playing sports?

Because she always ran away from the ball &ltp&gt My favorite joke since I was little

What has eighteen legs and fetches a ball?

The Philadelphia Beagles!

What do you get when you have two balls in your hand?

A man's undivided attention!

What does it mean if you look down and see four balls instead of two?

Careful, you might be getting screwed.

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Orphanage Jokes More Orphanage Jokes

Why did I leave my grades at the orphanage?

I couldn't raise them

What's the difference between an Isis camp and an orphanage?

I don't know, I just fly the drone

Good Jokes More Good Jokes

What is the best part about taking a shower?

Not being able to see yourself in the mirror afterward.

What's the best part about living in Flint, Michigan?

Leaded gasoline is pretty cheep!

Time Jokes More Time Jokes

What time is it when you sit on a pin?

Spring time.

How do you get 20 Canadians out of a pool?

Okay folks, time to get out of the pool!

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why is hip hop popular among urban youth?

Because it's the only time a black man can tell a crowd of white people to put their hands in the air.

What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?

A mechanic.

Episode Jokes More Episode Jokes

What do you get if you flip a Mississippi family's photo album backwards?

An episode of The Biggest Loser

How many saiyans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just one. But it takes five episodes.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why are you wearing a tuxedo?

The man responds "If I'm going to be im-po-tant, I want to look im-po-tant!"

What's it called when you go around looking for stuff to buy that's made in America?

Antiquing.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What can I get for you?

Me: Steak, please. W: How would you like that cooked M: By anyone other than my wife

How about a quickie?

Wife: As opposed to what

Come Jokes More Come Jokes

What were you before you came to school boys and girls?

Asked the teacher hoping that someone would say "babies." She was disappointed when all the children cried out "Happy!"

What kind of horse can swim underwater without coming up for air?

A seahorse!