They're not infallible
This is my domain
X marks the pot, matey.
A Piano.
Half to none of the time.
Just add a G and now she's gone.
He screwed, nutted, and bolted.
If you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them for years.
Bob
Branch Manager
Their phones would get wet.
Link: It's raining Z: No it's not L: *Plays Song of Storms* Z: You're sleeping with Epona tonight
Dos y dos
C and Y
Pair-o-Medics
A double-vowel shotgun.
Aye, you'd think it was R, but tis the C
You'd think its R but it's actually the C
Eh, it's some number you've probably never heard of.
Because 7 ate 9.
Nothing
A coconut.
He was just minding his Ps and Qs.
A gator-aid. Bet you did see that one coming:P
H: She meant nothing to me! M: Not that. You bought lite sour cream!
Me hands her money: When we get to the movies, buy a large popcorn. 10: This is only $2 M: Exactly
I pity the full!
You'd think it would be "T", but it is "U". *Favourite, btw.
It takes 1 to screw it in, and 99 to tweet about it.
Because 99% of its products are made from recycled material.
Because there were so many knights! Credit: watching Mr. D on Netflix
Because they want the D.
The 100-meter daesh. Q: What's Isis' favorite punctuation mark? A: The em-daesh. Q: How much cinnamon does the Isis recipe for gingersnaps call for? A: Just a daesh.
She soldered on.
Celebrity adoption.
Dad: Ahh *rubs back of neck* At the Bellagio in Las Vegas. -Rly Dad: Wd I lie to u, Bestwestern Broomcloset
Any way you want, concrete floors tend to be very hard to crack.
Awkward.
W
Are you 0K
There are more ducks on that side.
Student: H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O. Teacher: That's not what I taught you. Student: But you said the formula for water was...H to O.
Me:"I've had these for years. Is that a new grill I saw " H:"Nope just cleaned the old one" *Marriage lies
They roll their J's.
Horror-scopes!
