A centipede with a wooden leg!
I feel sorry for you son, I got 99 problems but you got imaginary ones
100; 1 to do it, and 99 to say "I could do that."
It takes 1 to screw it in, and 99 to tweet about it.
100. 1 to actually clean the shower, and 99 to stand around and talk about how filthy it is.
100. One to actually clean it, and 99 to talk about how dirty it is.
They're not infallible
A receding hare line.
Fixed) 100. 1 to change it and 99 to stand around and complain about how they coulda done a better job.
100. 1 to change the light bulb and the other 99 to complain about how the old light bulb was much better.
100, 1 to screw it in and 99 to say how they could do it better.
The front row at a Willie Nelson concert.
I never payed a hundred bucks to have a Lima Bean on my face.
Deer Nuts. Beer Nuts are $1.49, while Deer nuts are under a Buck!
Day coming up tomorrow where people who don't know how calendars work tweet.
They were ravin' with Raven.
They have the knights watch.
In mooments
Student: "HIJKLMNO." Teacher: "What are you talking about " Student: "Yesterday you said it's H to O!"
One had to P.
She asked me. Her face looked quite taken aback when I said, "Facebook"
Toucan play at that game
Just add a G and now she's gone.
Take away the G.
Defiled.
Down in the mouth!
They both have problems finding x.
Because they're always trying to find the x. They don't know y, either.
