Lottery Jokes

Why did the Greenlander get so angry when he didn't win the lottery?

Because he was inuit to win it

Everyday Deserves a Joke

$19.99

What do they call the lottery in Africa?

Celebrity adoption.

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

How amazing is it that nobody in the same Kingdom as Cinderella, had the same sized feet as her?

She should play the lottery too!

What lottery did the broom win?

The sweepstakes.

What's the difference between a person that just won the lottery and a fairy in salt water?

One is tickled pink, the other is a pickled Tink.

Who's there! Charles! Charles who?

Charles your luck on the lottery!

What did the electrical engineer do when she found out that she hadn't won the lottery?

She soldered on.

You might also enjoy:

Half Jokes More Half Jokes

What do you call half a ginger?

George.

What is the difference between the first and last desk of a viola section?

Half a measure.

Quick Way Jokes More Quick Way Jokes

What's the quickest way to a woman's heart?

The rib cage.

What's the quickest way to make nine million dollars?

Date Simon Cowell.

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why do people keep a picture of their wife and kids in their wallet?

To remind them why there's no money in it

How do you know when you're turning 40?

When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

Why can't Stevie Wonder see his friends...?

Because he's married.

What do you like to do in your free time?

Guy: I spy on people. Girl: Really I like to take long walks in the park and go to the movies with my friends. Guy: I know.

O Jokes More O Jokes

What do you call 2 doctors walking together?

Pair-o-Medics

What's that over there, is it a gho-o-o-ost?

Ooooooooo S: OK! OK!

Pack Jokes More Pack Jokes

How can you tell elephants love to travel?

They are always packing their trunk!

What animals were last to leave the ark?

The elephants as they had to pack their trunks!

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Where did the cat go when it lost it's tail?

To the retail store!

Who lost a herd of elephants?

Big bo peep!

Tony Romo Jokes More Tony Romo Jokes

How do you say Tony Romo in Spanish?

Mark Sanchez.

What is Tony Romo's favorite lottery game?

Pick Six