What did the man reply to his friend that found a good paying job taking care of mentally challenged people?

Oh, so it has its ups and downs.

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What's black and found at the top of a stair case?

Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

How do you find a blind man at a nudist colony?

It's not hard

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What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?

Get married on his birthday.

What kind of man was Boaz before he got married?

Ruth-less.

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Who pays?

Germany.

How much does a pirate pay for an ear piercing?

A buck an ear

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What is not the answer to this question?

Not this.

What's another name for pickled bread?

Dill-dough.

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What did the psychic velociraptor say to his friend?

Dino what you're thinking.

What did the yogi say to his friends when they asked him to leave?

Nah I'ma stay

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Why did Billy not care who he offended while posting on the internet?

Because the ends justify the memes

Where were you born?

Me: Missouri. I: What state are you in now? M: Apathy. I: That's not what I meant. M: I don't care.

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Why did Steve hate being the youngest clone?

Because all his genes were hand me downs.

How is life at the post office going?

It's going well I guess. It has its usps and it's downs. Edited for correctness

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What you got there?

Not sure", replies the fellow, "But you have got to try-a-lil'-bite!"

What have you been doing for it?

She replies, "Snorting pepper."

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What's the difference between a problem and a challenge?

A student repsonds, "3 boys + 1 girl = problem. 1 boy + 3 girls = challenge."

What did the man reply to his friend that found a good paying job taking care of mentally challenged people?

Oh, so it has its ups and downs.

Up Jokes More Up Jokes

How did you prepare for today?

Red carpet question with "Cocaine and sit ups." #GoldenGlobes

Why can't t-rexs do push ups?

Because they have been extinct for 65 million years.