What happens if the baby pees?

Pregnant wife: She won't. She waits till she's born 5: Right. Just like no one pees in the pool

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

How many atheist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. It will happen itself.

What happens to a tapeworm after it dies?

It will be interred.

Bear Jokes More Bear Jokes

Why'd you name me Carson, dad?

You were born in a car. Now go fetch your sister, Hospitaldaughter. It's time for tablemeal.

What do you call a bear who's just got too much darn cartilage?

A gristly bear.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

How many gears does a French Tank have?

5. 4 reverse and 1 forward for parades.

What are the 5 best Vegetables of all time?

Tink about it. Gai lan, gai lan... gai lan, gai lan, and gai lan. (thanks to Chapelle show skit((making the band)))

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

How to keep idiot waiting?

I'll tell tomorrow.

How does a blonde set the time on her alarm clock?

She waits until midnight and plugs it back in. Disclaimer: I know it's terrible, I was very young when I came up with it.

Pee Jokes More Pee Jokes

Why's a pretty girl like you sitting all alone?

Me: I peed my pants.

Why do you have to pee so quickly after you start drinking beer?

Because it doesn't have to stop off to change color!

Pool Jokes More Pool Jokes

What's Irish and sits by the pool?

Paddy O'Furniture

What's the difference between a paddling pool and a toddler?

The pool doesn't scream when you go in dry.

Pregnant Wife Jokes More Pregnant Wife Jokes

Why do I have a temperature of 101.3?

Me: Maybe you're pregnant Wife: What's wrong with you *damn you webMD, damn you.

What happens if the baby pees?

Pregnant wife: She won't. She waits till she's born 5: Right. Just like no one pees in the pool