Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

Previous Random Joke Next
People Jokes More People Jokes

Why are people with celiac disease more likely to get into heaven?

Because they reject setian.

What happened to the joke that insulted the mods?

People laughed, because it was a good joke.

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What do neutrinos and I have in common?

We're always penetrating your mom

What did little Paul Bunyan say when his mom asked him how he damaged his favorite toy?

It was an ax-I-dent.

Baby Jokes More Baby Jokes

What kind of bird brings no babies?

A swallow.

Why is a baby like an diamond?

Because it's a dear little thing.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What is the scariest thing to read in braile?

Do not touch

Why do soviet policemen travel in groups of three?

One to read, one to write, and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

5 Jokes More 5 Jokes

What can 5 men do that 5 women can't do?

Pee in a cup.

Why are we here?

Me: Philosophers still don't know 5: No, why are we HERE Wife: Your dad is lost and won't ask for directions

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

Why do you keep going back to that fishing website?

I can't help it I'm hooked.

What's the difference between a good friend and a really good friend?

A good friend will help you move house A really good friend will help you move a body!

Instruction Jokes More Instruction Jokes

How would you describe yourself in 3 words or less?

Doesn't follow instructions very well.

What are instructions?

Correct.

Congratulate Jokes More Congratulate Jokes

How do you congratulate a fighter after winning a match?

Good jab.

How did the triangle congratulate the other triangle after hooking up with Pentagon?

3edgy5me