Instruction Jokes

Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

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What are instructions?

Correct.

What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

With a drum machine you only have to punch the instructions in once

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

How would you describe yourself in 3 words or less?

Doesn't follow instructions very well.

Why wasn't I able to see the instruction manual?

Because the instructions were clear.

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Read Jokes More Read Jokes

What do you call someone who reads in the sun?

Well Red.

What will never be read in braille?

Do not touch.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What car do polite cowboys drive?

Audi!

What car does Catwoman drive?

A Purrgeot.

Punch Jokes More Punch Jokes

What does Captain Falcon drink in Hawaii?

PUNCH!

What's Chris Brown's favourite drink?

Punch

Manual Jokes More Manual Jokes

How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?

Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals"

Why do Americans get manuals when buying a new car?

I thought they only drive automatic

Congratulate Jokes More Congratulate Jokes

Why do people congratulate you when Mom is the one making the baby?

Me: I helped 5: How Me: 5: Me: I read her the instructions

How did the triangle congratulate the other triangle after hooking up with Pentagon?

3edgy5me

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

What is that thing, which the maker cannot use, and the user cannot see?

Coffin

What do you get when you cross a dyslexic, an atheist, an insomniac?

A person that lays awake late at night and ponders if there's such a thing as a dog.

Mail Jokes More Mail Jokes

What do vampires put at the bottom of their e-mails?

Best viscious.

Why didn't the internit get any e-mail?

Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

Why didn't the cashier laugh at my joke?

It didn't make cents

Why was Stalin a Bad leader?

Because he was staling a country that was rushing..(Russia) This joke was bad. Im going to bed now.