What has four legs and isn't alive?

Son: "nice try, a chair!" Dad: "Nope. Our dog just died."

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Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg?

Limp Biscuit.

What is a double amputee's favorite video game?

League of Leg ends.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What place of business helps dogs who have lost their tails?

A retail store.

Why did the dog go to the funeral?

Because he was a paw bearer.

Dad Jokes More Dad Jokes

What did the cow say when she got hit by a car?

Moo." What did the cow saw when she fell into a ditch? "Moo." What did the cow say when she fell onto the electric fence? "Moo." What did the cow say when she got hit by a train? "Why does everything always happen to meeee?" Protip: My dad wrote this joke for me when I was six.

What is the difference between wealth and poverty?

And the dad says: 'Wealth is caviar, champagne and women. Poverty is hot pocket, beer and your mother!'

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

What happens to lawyers after they die?

They lie still.

Why did Bilbo Baggins die with a Erection?

Because old hobbits die hard. (Just a different Punchline)

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

Why did you name your son Tinnitus?

I don't know, me and my wife just thought it had a nice ring to it.

How'd you sleep last night?

Son says: "umm... With my eyes closed " Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl.

Chair Jokes More Chair Jokes

Who the hell buys furniture online?

Why would you buy a chair or couch you can't even sit in What if it has burlap cushions stuffed w/hay

How many blonde's does it take to screw In a light bulb?

3: One holds the light bulb, and the other two spin the Chair.

Nice Try Jokes More Nice Try Jokes

What has four legs and isn't alive?

Son: "nice try, a chair!" Dad: "Nope. Our dog just died."