What's the difference between an 18 year-old girl and a washing machine?

When you dump a load in the washer, it will not follow you around for two months.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between your mama and a washing machine?

The washing machine doesn't follow me around for a week after I dump a load in it.

What is the difference between a English actuary and a Sicilian actuary?

An English actuary can tell you how many people are going to die next year. A Sicilian actuary can give you their names...

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

How Long Does It Take A Black Woman To Take A Dump?

9 months.

What do you call taking a dump after breakfast?

A Brexit

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What do you call those people who follow musicians around and try to hang with them after the show?

Drummers.

What do you call an elf that follows Scientology?

Elron Hubbard

Month Jokes More Month Jokes

What do you get when Steve Jobs hires and fires a lot of people in six months?

An Apple turnover.

Which is the month in which women talk the least?

February... because it has the least number of days

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What about the two old ladies who brought a bottle of whiskey to the baseball game?

At the bottom of the fifth the bags were loaded.

What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine?

You can throw your load in a washing machine and it won't follow you around for two weeks afterward

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

Why is a woman unlike a washing machine?

After you throw a load in a washing machine it doesn't follow you around.

What's the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

If I dump a load in a washing machine it doesn't follow me around for the next few weeks.

Washer Jokes More Washer Jokes

How you turn a washer into a snow blower?

Hand her a shovel

What is the difference between a girl and a washer?

The washer doesn't follow you around after you put a load in it.