Whats the difference between a washing machine and a woman?

A washing machine doesn't follow you around after you dump a load in it.

This joke may have profanity.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a pick-up artist and an Atari 2600?

An Atari 2600 has more game.

What's the difference between writing your will and owning an ant farm?

One's a legacy, the other a sea of legs.

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the difference between a rectal and an oral thermometer?

The taste.

What does a guy who can predict the lottery numbers 99% of the time have in common with the letters C, D, G, H, J, K, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, and Z?

They're not infallible

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What is the Pope's favorite type of woman?

Nun

Why was the woman so attached to her Dr. Scholl's gel insert?

OC It was her sole comfort.

Dump Jokes More Dump Jokes

Where did William Tell take his garbage?

To the dump, to the dump, to the dump, dump, dump!

Why was the web server down?

Mary Jane dumped him.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What's the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

If I dump a load in a washing machine it doesn't follow me around for the next few weeks.

Where did Napoleon keep his armies?

IN HIS SLEEVIES! Best used with little kids, or followed by maniacal laughter.

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What did the man say when the calculator agreed to help him load the car?

I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU

How do you make a redditor impatient?

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Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

What's yellow and goes around?

A banana in the washing machine.

What is agitated buy joyful?

A washing machine