What's the difference between driving a car on an empty tank of gas and having diarrhea?

One you're running on fumes, the other you're fuming with the runs.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a hippie and a geologist?

Not much. One likes getting stones, the other likes getting stoned.

What's the difference between a laundry machine and a girl?

The washing machine doesn't get upset if I dump a load in it and never call back

Car Jokes More Car Jokes

What kind of car does Yoda drive?

A Toy-Yoda

What weighs more than a car and uses a lot of fuel, but hardly ever moves?

Your mom.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What car does Boba Fett drive?

A ManDeLorean.

Why do Americans get manuals when buying a new car?

I thought they only drive automatic

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What can run out before you've had a chance to use it?

Slaves.

What's similar between a racehorse and a leaky faucet?

They're both off and running.

Diarrhea Jokes More Diarrhea Jokes

Why did the little black kid start crying when he had diarrhea?

He thought he was melting.

Where do tech guys with diarrhea go to work?

IBM

Gas Jokes More Gas Jokes

What do you call gas from the human body that NASA could impliment into fuel for their technology in the future?

Rocket Farts.

What do cars and humans have in common?

We both burn gas.

Tank Jokes More Tank Jokes

Why does the French Military install rearview mirrors on their tanks?

So that they can see the battle.

What did the one fish in the tank say to the other?

Do you know how to drive this thing

Fume Jokes More Fume Jokes

Why did the marijuana addict lose the race?

He was running on fumes.

What's the difference between driving a car on an empty tank of gas and having diarrhea?

One you're running on fumes, the other you're fuming with the runs.