What's the difference between Jared from Subway's gut and his junk?

He prefers his gut when it's down 45 pounds, and his junk when it's up 45 pounds.

A washing machine doesn't follow the guy around for 2 weeks after he drops a load in it.

What's the difference between a masochist and a blogger?

There's none, both live for the hits.

Prefer Jokes More Prefer Jokes

What movie aspect ratio do cats prefer?

Litterbox.

What type of fruit do twins prefer?

Pears.

Gut Jokes More Gut Jokes

Why can't spooky skeletons cross the road?

No guts.

Why did the skeleton burp in the church?

He didn't have the guts to fart

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

How are strippers and Subway workers similar?

They'll both lie and tell you it's a footlong to get paid.

What's Jared's favorite ingredient for his Subway sandwiches?

Extra virgin oil

Jared Jokes More Jared Jokes

Why does little sally have a limp?

SHE WENT TO JARED!

What time was it when Jared got fired?

When the big hand touched the little hand

Junk Jokes More Junk Jokes

What did the Chinese fisherman say to his at-risk son?

Stay on the junk, and you'll go far.

Why did the elephants go on a diet?

Because they had too much junk in the trunk.

45 Pound Jokes More 45 Pound Jokes

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 45 pounds. What's the differece between a husband and a boyfriend 45 minutes