What's the worst part of giving a magician a ride home?

When you get there, you turn into the driveway. Ba-dum-bum! Don't forget to tip your waitress!

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Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What's the big deal about Jesus turning water into wine?

I turned MY student loans into vodka...

How do you know?

My phone is turned off.

Driveway Jokes More Driveway Jokes

How can you tell if Asians have broken into your house?

The dog is gone, the homework is done, and they're still trying to get out of the driveway.

Who is that walking up my driveway?

Anxiety in 3...2...1... knock, knock *sigh* "WAIT A SECOND!" *mumbles* "I need to find pants."

Tip Jokes More Tip Jokes

What do waiters want most after dinner?

The tip!

How much did the critic tip the waiter?

Two cents

Forget Jokes More Forget Jokes

Why did Putin forget his backpack at home when leaving for school?

He was Russian.

What's the most common activity people do while wearing safety vests?

Reflect! I use this dadjoke on my pregnant wife every day when she goes out for walks after dark and wears a safety vest.. 'Now honey, don't forget to reflect on all sorts of things, especially car headlights!'

Magician Jokes More Magician Jokes

Why are magicians always sad?

Because everything they have disappears

What do you call a beauty pageant for cartographers and magicians?

Miss Direction.

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part about being a beaver?

It's a lot of dam work.

What did the boy buy at the grocery store?

Too Bad, I'm not telling you!

Waitress Jokes More Waitress Jokes

When a waitress asks me if I want soup or salad, I always ask "who's in charge of tossing the salads here?

Then I frown & order the soup.

What's the difference between a waiter and a waitress?

The size of the tip.