What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil?

I wouldn't pay 50 to have a lentil on my face...

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between starlings and swallows?

Your mum doesn't starlings.

What's the difference between a ginger girl and a vampire?

One bursts into flames in the sunlight, and the other is a vampire.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

How often to wizard journalists get paid?

They make a Daily Prophet.

How much do pirates pay for their earrings?

About a buccaneer!

50 Jokes More 50 Jokes

What do you call 50 feminists on a bus?

Trick Question. You can't fit 50 feminists on a bus.

How many people with OCD does it take to fix a lightbulb?

Only one, but they have to turn it on and off 50 times before they're sure it's fixed.

Chickpea Jokes More Chickpea Jokes

What are peas attracted to?

Chickpeas

What's the difference between a lima bean and a chickpea?

I've never had a lima bean on my chest

Lentil Jokes More Lentil Jokes

Whats the difference between a Chickpea and a Lentil?

No one ever paid $50 to have a Lentil on their face.

What did the pulse say to the legume as he left?

Lentil next time.

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

What did Serena say to Venus before they faced off in the US Open?

In tennis, love means nothing.

When faced with a challenging situation I calmly ask myself "what would The Hulk do?"

Then I rip my clothes and smash stuff up!