Why are you so happy?

Girl2: I was complimented on my driving today. Someone left a note on my windshield that said "Parking Fine"

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why did the leper fail his driving test?

He left his foot on the clutch.

Why did the farmer's house catch on fire?

He left his home on the range.

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

What kind of cars do shellfish drive?

Mussel cars.

Who me?

Ohhh, I'm just driving around town, painting "free candy" on the side of creepy looking vans.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What are you doing today?

2: 'Well, I think I can really push my limits' 1: 'Oh right, are you sure ' 2: 'I'm definite'.

How woke?

Me: We're putting Harriet Tubman on something that enslaves us all today.

Note Jokes More Note Jokes

What do you get when you cross an oven with a car?

A hot rod. NOTE: When I was about 5, I thought this was the funniest joke on earth.

What type of writing makes the most money?

Ransom notes.

Compliment Jokes More Compliment Jokes

How do you compliment a scarecrow?

Tell him he's outstanding in his field!

How do you compliment a girl with a cold sore?

You tell her that her smile is contagious.

Windshield Jokes More Windshield Jokes

Why can't cars fly kites?

Because of the windshield.

Why do airplanes manufactured in Spain have windshield wipers on the inside?

Because the rain in Spain falls mostly in the plain.