50 Shade Jokes

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Copy Jokes More Copy Jokes

What's the difference between a pun and a copy of Cliff's Notes?

A pun is a play on words, while Cliff's notes are a word on plays

What do you call twin policemen?

Copies.

5000 Jokes More 5000 Jokes

Why did the Mexican Army only bring 5000 soldiers to the Alamo?

They only had 2 vans

Why did 5000 Mexicans show up to fight at the Alamo?

They only had two cars.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

How do you tell the difference between a chemistry professor and a politician?

Just ask them to read this word: unionized.

What does the torch represent in the hand of the Statue of Liberty?

The torch is a symbol of her inability to read in the dark.

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

What do you call it when you tie a brick to a jar of Miracle Whip and throw it into the ocean?

Sink-o de Mayo

What did one strand of yarn say to the other?

I'm not ready to dye, I still have a few ends to tie up. "Ball up..."

Cross Jokes More Cross Jokes

Why did Chewbacca cross the road?

WWWRRRRRRGWWWRRRR!

Why doesn't the dinosaur cross the road anymore?

Because their eggs stink. (They're extinct)

Movie Jokes More Movie Jokes

What famous pig actor made a movie about Frankenswine?

Boaris Karloff.

What's common between a crying baby and a gun?

You must not bring either to the movies.

Queen Jokes More Queen Jokes

What kind of umbrella does the Queen of England carry on a rainy day?

A wet one.

Why would the Queen let Netflix use her likeness in "The Crown"?

She probably gets royalties

Good Way Jokes More Good Way Jokes

What's the best way to get your guitar player to turn down the volume?

Give him the sheet music.

What's the best way to keep water from running?

Don't pay the water bill.