50 Shade Jokes

What book does the Queen of England read to get herself into a raunchy mood?

50 Shades of Earl Grey

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What do you get if you cross 50 Shades of Grey with Blurred Lines?

A greydient

What do you call the kinkiest/nastiest move from 50 Shades of Gray?

The Gray Poupon

What did Christian Grey say when he read reviews of his movie?

People did not like my movie. I guess I am 50 shades of letdown... But I can sure GET UP"!

Why do you have a copy of 50 Shades of Grey in your bathroom?

Perv! Me: Oh. No that's just for when I run out of toilet paper.

Why is there only 50 shades of grey?

Why not 5,000 What's stopping them

What do you call a naked old man crawling out of a coal mine?

50 shades of grey's anatomy

What's the best way for a lady to read 50 Shades of Grey?

To flick through it as fast as possible.

How about some snappy one-liners?

Ironically, the only way you could get me to watch 50 shades of gray is if you tied me up and forced me to watch it.

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What did they call the man who knew how to read maps?

A legend

Why do liberals travel in threes?

One to read one to write and the other one to keep an eye on both intellectuals.

Coal Jokes More Coal Jokes

What do you call it when one piece of coal asks another piece of coal out to dinner?

Carbon dating.

Why are steam trains naughty around Christmas?

They're hoping Santa will give them a lump of coal.

Gray Jokes More Gray Jokes

What do you call the kinkiest/nastiest move from 50 Shades of Gray?

The Gray Poupon

Why don't Baptist preachers color their hair?

They just pray the gray away

People Jokes More People Jokes

What do you call someone pretending to nice to people just to get upvotes?

Karma chameleon

Why don't people raid dodo nests anymore?

Because their eggs stinked!

Flick Jokes More Flick Jokes

Why did Rick Astley get fired from his job at the video store?

Because he refused to rent someone a copy of the Pixar flick "Up".

How many IT guys does it take to change a light bulb?

No IT guys change light bulbs, they just keep flicking the switch on and off again until something happens.

Book Jokes More Book Jokes

Whenever we keep the money in the bags our son steals it, I don't know what to do?

Husband: Keep it in his books. I know he will never touch them....

What happened to the Polish National Library?

Someone stole the book.

Crawl Jokes More Crawl Jokes

How do you keep a baby from crawling in circles?

Nail the other hand to the floor.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in a circle?

Nail it's other hand to the floor.

5000 Jokes More 5000 Jokes

What did Davy Crockett say when he looked over The Alamo wall and saw 5,000 Mexican Soldiers?

Who the hell ordered a new roof?

Why is there only 50 shades of grey?

Why not 5,000 What's stopping them