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Bar Stool Jokes

What do you call a 1,000 pound woman sitting on a bar stool?

A half-ton pickup.

Birthday State of Mind

Birthday State of Mind

How do you fit 4 girls on a bar stool?

Flip it over

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Diaper Jokes More Diaper Jokes

How many blondes does it take to change a diaper?

Ask Hugh Hefner.

How do diapers work?

Hnng. Aaaaaaaah. Like that. I'll show myself the door.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call a man with no body and a nose?

Nobody knows!

What are the two words men hate most unless used together?

Don't Stop

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part of having a lung transplant?

Knowing that the first couple of times you cough that the phlegm isn't yours.

What's the worst part about 30 lawyers in a bus going over a cliff?

The bus could fit 30 more lawyers.

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What did the Triceratops sit on?

Its Tricerabottom.

What do you call 7 white guys sitting on a bench?

The NBA

Upside Jokes More Upside Jokes

What do you do when you see an upside down dolphin?

You flipper!

What is the most popular cheese in "the Upside Down"?

Demogorgonzola

Stool Jokes More Stool Jokes

How do you fit 4 guys on a bar stool?

Turn it upside-down. But how do you get them off Shake the stool. (OK, I'll leave now.)

What did the proctologist ask the restaurant goer?

Can I push your stool in?

Bar Jokes More Bar Jokes

A SQL query walks into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks...

'Can I join you?'

What did the frog say when he walked into the bar?

Bonjour.*

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?

They don't change it, they just take forever to find where to fit the batteries