Commander Jokes

Who is the commander of cheese?

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What did the commander say when she realized that she had left Matt Damon on Mars?

I have left my Mark on Mars

Why did all most of the black soldiers die in Vietnam?

When the commander yelled "GET DOWN", they all started dancing.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens when you keep feeding a cow money?

You get rich milk.

Which global disasters happen when you drop a roast turkey?

The downfall of Turkey, the break-up of China, and the overthrow of Greece.

Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

Why is marriage like thin toilet paper?

Because you end up with a ring on your finger.

Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket?

He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.

Mark Jokes More Mark Jokes

What did the commander say when she realized that she had left Matt Damon on Mars?

I have left my Mark on Mars

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What do a hurricane a tornado a fire and a divorce have in common?

They are four ways you can lose your house!

Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired?

Because he couldn't keep his calves together!

Stone Jokes More Stone Jokes

What does weed and the Quran have in common?

If you burn it you get stoned

What do you call someone who gets stoned and baked?

A witch.

Flight Jokes More Flight Jokes

What do you call a snarky criminal going down a flight of stairs?

A condescending con descending.

How to climb a flight of stairs?

Step one Step two Step three

Super Hero Jokes More Super Hero Jokes

What's the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?

One is a super hero and the other is a simple command.

What is the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?

The first is a super hero, the second is a simple command.

Ironman Jokes More Ironman Jokes

What's the difference between ironman and ironwoman?

One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.

What is the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman?

Ironman is a superhero, Ironwoman is a command.