Hearse Jokes

A Corpseman. Painfully obvious, yet a terrible play on the English language, I know. It was something I came up with a few years ago, for some unknown reason.

Rehearsal Jokes More Rehearsal Jokes

What do you call a repair shop that specializes in hearses?

A rehearsal.

What do you call the action where a dead guy falls out of a car and you have to put him back in?

A rehearsal

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

How does a Russian count '1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi...'?

1 CCCP, 2 CCCP, 3 CCCP... Iwillseemyselfout

What do you get when you put a number 1 and a number 2 on your calculator?

A huge mess.

Specialize Jokes More Specialize Jokes

What do you call an Italian mobster who specializes in cold coffee drinks?

Al Frap-Pacino

What do you call the grounds of a university that specializes in teaching neuroscience to hippopotamuses?

Hippocampus!

Bathroom Jokes More Bathroom Jokes

Why can't you hear it when a pteranodon goes to the bathroom?

Because they're all dead.

Why did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth?

He ate his pizza before it was cool. (Written anonymously in the bathroom at work, a pizza joint.)