Power Jokes

How do you get to a position of power in a science lab?

Work over time

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What do you call a rocket-powered car?

An Otto-mobile

What is the unit of power?

Yes.

Why was the Boy having trouble finding power in the Cul-de-sac?

There was no outlet

How did Vladimir Lenin originally get into power?

This isn't just a campaign, this is a political

What do you call a group of scientists discussing different ways to recycle power?

A conversation of energy.

What happens in a Chinese restaurant when the power goes out?

It'll dim sum

How much power does it take to move a tank?

A horse

Why is it dark in Skeletor's castle?

Because He-Man has the power.

How much power does a hearse have?

1 corpsepower

What do you call a flesh light powered by your smartphone?

IFap

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What do you call a dinosaur with too much power?

A tyrant-osaurus rex!

How did Thor's brother get his powers?

Just Loki I guess

How is it that magic carpets are able to fly?

They are powered by turban engines.

What do you call a seafood restaurant that generates its own power?

A fission-chips shop.

What are swearing outdoor grills powered with?

Profane tanks.

Why did the lawyer with a torn ACL still win the marathon?

OC) Because he had the power of a torn knee

Why should you never drink German beer with Chinese food?

An hour later you're hungry for power.

When The NSA is Monitoring Your Computer?

The power is on and you're connected to the internet.

Why does Steven Hawking hate the band Muse?

Because he can't stand their song Uprising, it wants him to rise up and take the power back.

Why wouldn't Kurt Cobain let you charge your phone at his house?

The guy likes his power chords too much.

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What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?

When the power goes off.

How do you pronounce the "Pao" in "Power'?

Deleted

What man?

The man with the power." - "What power " - "The power of Hoodoo." - "Who do " - "You do." - "Do what " - "Remind me of a man."

What do you call a nuclear-powered car?

A mobile-Chernobyl!

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What's the difference between a lawyer and an onion?

You cry when you cut up an onion.

What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6.022x1023 pieces?

Guacamole.

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Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?

They say he made a mint.

What's a hipster's biggest problem?

You probably haven't heard it.

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What are the two words men hate most unless used together?

Don't Stop

What did the bartender day to the man who was drinking his vodka to fast?

Stop "Russian"

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What does a power ranger say before they do drugs?

It's morphine time!

What did the power ranger-turned-addict say?

It's morphine time!

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What does a power ranger say before they do drugs?

It's morphine time!

What did one washed up Power Ranger say to the other?

It's Morphine Time!

Wash Jokes More Wash Jokes

What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?

A wash and wear wolf

Why do people wash their clothes in Tide?

Because it's too cold out tide.

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What do my iPhone and my girlfriend have in common?

They both go off again two minutes later to remind me of the same thing.

What Johnny Mercer song does December 21st remind you of?

Autumn Leaves.

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Why don't atheists use exponents?

Because they don't believe in higher powers.

Why can't Atheist solve exponential equations?

Because they don't believe in higher powers