Why did the dog sleep so poorly?

By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What does Green Day say before bed?

Green night

What is a long distance love?

It's when you're in the office, bed is at home and whiskey is in the bar.

Dog Jokes More Dog Jokes

What does an agnostic... dyslexic insomniac do at night?

He lays awake and wonders if there really is a dog.

What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic spend most of his time doing?

Staying up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Pop Jokes More Pop Jokes

What did the baby corn say to the mama corn?

Wheres pop corn?

How do you process a queue of table delete requests for an asynchronous database?

Pop, Lock & Drop It

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What do you call it when a sheep sells his wool for money?

Cashearing! (Joke I made up last night at work, so be gentle with me)

How can a man go eight days without sleep?

No problem, He sleeps at night.

Mistake Jokes More Mistake Jokes

Why was the slab of marble upset?

He was tired of everyone mistaking him for granite.

Why didn't the recently single goose lose her job when she made a mistake?

Because she had one heck of an ex-goose

Plug Jokes More Plug Jokes

How do you plug a plow into a car stereo?

Through the ox input.

Why did the dog sleep so poorly?

By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!

Toaster Jokes More Toaster Jokes

What did the toaster say to the bread?

I want you inside me.

What did the bread say before it jumped into the toaster?

I'M BREADY TO DIE

Electric Blanket Jokes More Electric Blanket Jokes

Why did the dog sleep so poorly?

By mistake he plugged his electric blanket into the toaster and kept popping out of bed all night!