Medication Jokes

Why is the magnet on medication?

Because it's bipolar

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What did the urologist say to his patient who forgot to take his medication?

Urine trouble!

What medication that can make people inspire you?

Aspirin sorry guys

What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.

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Bulb Jokes More Bulb Jokes

How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?

22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

How many engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to screw in the bulb and another to talk about how complicated it was.

Price Jokes More Price Jokes

Why was the gourmet upset when he saw the menu?

The prices were gastronomical...

How do you know you are in the gardening section of Home Depot?

Everything is priced in pesos.

Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

Why did the doctor quit his job?

He ran out of patients.

Why was the doctor annoyed?

Because he didn't have any patients.

Pharmacy Jokes More Pharmacy Jokes

Why should you be quiet in a pharmacy?

In case you wake the sleeping pills!

What do you call that part of the pharmacy where they keep the condoms, birth-control pills, etc.?

The Contrasection.

Buddhist Monk Jokes More Buddhist Monk Jokes

Why did the Buddhist monk refuse Novocain?

Because he wanted to transcend dental medication.

What do Buddhist monks have for breakfast?

Ommm' lettes!

Fish Jokes More Fish Jokes

What did the fish skeleton say?

Long time, no sea.

What's the difference......between a piano, a fish, and glue?

You can tune a piano but you can't tuna fish "What about the glue " I knew you'd get stuck on that.

Urine Trouble Jokes More Urine Trouble Jokes

Why is a UTI such a bad thing?

Because it means urine trouble

What did the police officer say to the man who was urinating publicly?

Urine trouble, mate!

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

What do a pair of briefs and a cheap hotel have in common?

No ballroom.

What do you get if cross two young dogs with a pair of headphones?

Hush puppies!