Medication Jokes

Why is the magnet on medication?

Because it's bipolar

Everyday Deserves a Joke

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What did the urologist say to his patient who forgot to take his medication?

Urine trouble!

What medication that can make people inspire you?

Aspirin sorry guys

What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.

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Patient Jokes More Patient Jokes

How's your headache?

Patient: She's out of town.

What did the psychiatrist say to the patient that showed up wearing Saran Wrap and nothing else?

I can clearly see your nuts!

Pharmacy Jokes More Pharmacy Jokes

Why did Lionel go to the medical store?

Because it was pharmacy.

Why should you be quiet in a pharmacy?

In case you wake the sleeping pills!

Pair Jokes More Pair Jokes

Why do toucans only go camping in pairs?

So they can bring two canopies.

Why doesn't The Rock just tell us what he's cooking?

I can't pair wines like this.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

How much longer do I have doc?

Doctor: "Ten." Patient: "Ten what " Doctor: "Nine..."

What do you call someone who barely graduated from med school?

Doctor.

2 Jokes More 2 Jokes

How many NBA finals does Lebron plan on losing?

Not 1 not 2 not 3 not 4 not 5 not 6 not 7

What do you call 2 algebraists who marry?

Prime mates

Buddhist Monk Jokes More Buddhist Monk Jokes

What does a Buddhist monk say when ordering a subway sandwich?

Make me one with everything*

How do Buddhist monks send emails?

They remove all attachments.

5000 Jokes More 5000 Jokes

What do you get when you take an HIV medication and raise the price 5,000%?

Rich AND famous, apparently

Why did the Mexicans only bring 5000 people to the Alamo?

They only had two vans

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many /r/jokes reposts does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Apparently a lot, because that lightbulb still isn't screwed in.

How many wiseguys does it take to change a lightbulb?

Who's asking