Paste Jokes

Why did people stop printing stamps with photo of Pamela Anderson?

Banta: Because people started licking the wrong side of it for pasting them on the envelopes..

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why do countries "cut ties" when things get tense?

So weird having men walk around in suits and half ties.

Where did the man with an undecorated yard put his spare change?

His Hedge Fund.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What is the magic word?

Son: Natasha Dad: who is Natasha son: your lover Dad: do you need also a case

How did OJ respond when his son asked to borrow the car?

GtOnly if you go aks your mother.

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

One fine morning in Eden, God was looking for Eve, but couldn't find them. God saw Adam and asked where Eve was? Adam replied, "She's down at the Ocean, taking a bath." "Damn," says God, "now all the fish will smell."

Why am I getting my Christmas presents in August?

Her mom replies, "Because it's cheaper than chemotherapy."

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What's the difference between and out-law and an in-law?

One's wanted.

Why did John Wayne get a weiner dog?

He wanted to get a long little doggy.

Sleep Pill Jokes More Sleep Pill Jokes

Why did the blonde tip toe near the medicine cabinet?

Because she didn't want to wake the sleeping pills!

Why did the old man sneak past the cupboard?

He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills.

Redditor Jokes More Redditor Jokes

What did one Redditor say to another?

Removed

How many redditors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but an extra 15 to repost.

Cupboard Jokes More Cupboard Jokes

What did Sean Connery say when a book from his cupboard fell on him?

I can only blame my shelf. Shout out to /r/shubreddit

What do you get if you cross a bag of snakes and a cupboard of food?

Snakes and Larders!sna

Fish Market Jokes More Fish Market Jokes

What did the blind man say when he walked into the fish market?

Good morniiiiiiing ladies!

What did the blind man say when he arrived at the fish market?

Hello, ladies.