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Pharmacist Jokes

What's the opposite of a pharmacist?

A harmacist

Love

Love

What's taking the pharmacist so long?

It's just one prescription" *behind the counter the pharmacist is sinking in quicksand and screaming*

Why can't Whitney Houston be a pharmacist?

She over doses

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.

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What happens when you spike Hawaiian Punch?

It gets a lil' kick.

Why was the volleyball player drunk at a game?

Because he spiked his drink

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know that Keira Knightley doesn't exist?

Because the camera adds 10 pounds.

How do we know that Jesus was made of bread?

Because yeasterday he died and tomorrow he will have risen.

Drug Dealer Jokes More Drug Dealer Jokes

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.

I don't know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

What does the drug dealer make sure to do?

Weed out only the best suppliers

Quicksand Jokes More Quicksand Jokes

What do you call... What do you call four Mexicans standing in quicksand?

Cuatros Cincos

What do you call 4 Mexicans in quicksand?

Quatro cinco

Cotton Picker Jokes More Cotton Picker Jokes

Junkie Jokes More Junkie Jokes

Why did the junkie walk into the pet store?

To buy some quack croakaine!

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

What do you mean I can't drink alcohol with this medication?

You're not a bartender! You're just a pharmacist.

What'll ya have?

Cat: Shot of rum. Bartender pours it Cat slowly pushes it off the bar Cat: Another.

Medication Jokes More Medication Jokes

What medications do I take?

I'm not sure. The names on my neighbor's prescription bottles are ridiculously long

Why is the magnet on medication?

Because it's bipolar