Profanity Jokes

What is the most used language in programming?

Profanity.

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Programming Jokes More Programming Jokes

What's does America and programming have in common?

When you fix one problem, 38 more problems pop up.

What's your job?

Programming. "What's your hobby " Programming. "What do you do when you're not programming " Think about programming.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What did the ant whisper into the elephant's ear that made the elephant faint?

I'm going to be the mother of your children." I have no idea whether the joke is lost in translation...

Why did the chick disappoint his mother?

Because he wasn't all he was *cracked up* to be.

Oedipus Jokes More Oedipus Jokes
Swear Jokes More Swear Jokes

How does a mathematician swear?

Math-you.

What does FTFY even mean?

I swear to god people abuse acronyms so much.

Language Jokes More Language Jokes

Why did your sister refuse the gift of a Japanese car?

Because she'd never be able to learn the language

Why is it so hard to pronounce words in Welsh?

It is the language of Wales.

Power Jokes More Power Jokes

How do you get to a position of power in a science lab?

Work over time

What is the only time a man thinks about a candlelight dinner?

When the power goes off.

Mouth Jokes More Mouth Jokes

What does a monster mom say to her kids at dinnertime?

Don't talk with someone in your mouth.

What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?

An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

Hate Jokes More Hate Jokes

Why does Russia not celebrate Thanksgiving?

Because they hate Turkey

Why does the NSA hate the winter?

They got snowed in.