S&M Jokes

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Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Why can't Sean Connery read November?

Because he hasn't Read October.

What do cats read in the morning?

Mewspapers!

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What did the digital clock say to it's Mother?

Look Ma, no hands!

Why should you date a girl who is good with her hands and plays soccer?

Because she's probably a keeper.

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

What does the Doctor use to keep things running smoothly in the T.A.R.D.I.S?

WD-4D

What did the doctor say to the patient who wanted to do his own surgery?

Suture self!

Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why do people call their weed the Koran?

Because if your burn it, it gets you stoned

How do you best serve burned food?

Coal'd.

Finish Jokes More Finish Jokes

Why did the husband go to jail for a crime his wife committed?

Because they finish each other's sentences

What are you celebrating?

They say "We finished this puzzle in only 6 months! And the box says from 2 to 4 years!"

Use Jokes More Use Jokes

What does a pig use to write his term papers with?

Pen and Oink!

What did Russians used to light their houses with before candles?

Electricity.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

Which city u cannot enter?

ELECTRICITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What position do u play?

ME: I'm a *thinks back to the only game I watched* wide-retriever.

Bath Jokes More Bath Jokes

What happened to the tiger who took a bath three times a day?

After a week he was spotless!

What'd u ask Santa for 6: a speed boat M: like a Lego boat?

6: no M: oh for the bath 6: no M: the pool 6: *doesnt break eye contact* no