Smart Guy Jokes

What do you call a smart guy in US?

A tourist.

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

I've Got a Whole Latte Jokes

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Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

Why did Russia lose the race?

Because it was Stalin! (Sorry. Communist jokes aren't funny unless every gets them.)

What's the difference between a saxophone and an onion?

You don't cry when you cut up a saxophone. Happy Saxophone Day Why this musical abomination deserves its own day is beyond me. Edit: beside to beyond

Essay Jokes More Essay Jokes

Why did the 14 year old Mexican girl end up pregnant?

Because her teacher told her to go do an essay.

Why did the 16 year old Mexican girl get pregnant?

Her teacher told her to go home and do an essay.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How many guys in IT does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two. One to identify that the lightbulb has indeed burned out, and one to call the maintenence man to change the lightbulb.

What did Obi-Wan Kenobi say to the guy at the liquor store?

Only a Sith deals in Absolut.

Write Jokes More Write Jokes

What does Dracula write on his Christmas cards?

Best vicious of the season

What was written on the UNIX user's doormat?

There's no place like cd

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What can I do you for?

Woman: a bottle of wine and cab fare

What did the sign convention management do to the woman who kept pulling down their long signs?

Banner.

Tourist Jokes More Tourist Jokes

What do you call a smart person in America?

A tourist.

Why do tourists always take pictures in Paris?

Because the tower is an Eiffel.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What did the choir teacher say to the student who asked to use the bathroom?

Of chorus.

How do you ask for a cigarette in Spain?

Tapas a snout!

Doctor Jokes More Doctor Jokes

Why was the doctor stressed?

He was losing his patients

Why is an apple a Dalek's favourite fruit?

Because it keeps the Doctor away!