Walter White Jokes

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

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What direction does a Walter White-themed GPS tell you to turn?

Goddamn right.

What do you get when you cast Michael J. Fox as Walter White?

Shaking Bad.

What does Walter White say when someone tells him a knock-knock joke?

Nothing, because he is the one who knocks.

Why did Walter White not pay for his pizza?

Because it was on the house.

Why can't you tell Walter White a knock knock joke?

Because HE is the one who knocks.

What does Walter White say when he tells a knock-knock joke?

I am the one who Knock-knocks.

What did Walter White teach?

Advanced methematics.

What is Walter White's favourite band?

Well it's not Saving Jane, that's for sure.

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Theme Jokes More Theme Jokes

What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when invited to the musician themed costume party?

I'll be Bach

What do you call a techno-themed grocery store?

Gigi D'Agostino

Heinz Jokes More Heinz Jokes

Why are your eyes covered in ketchup?

I'm often asked by people: "Why are your eyes covered in ketchup " So I tell them it's because Heinz sight is 20/20.

What is Walter White's favourite brand of ketchup?

Heinz-enburg.

House Jokes More House Jokes

What do you get if you squash a house?

A flat.

How did I get here?

I'm sure my neighbors ask the same question every time they catch me in their house...taking a shower.

Shake Jokes More Shake Jokes

Why are there no pictures of Ted Cruz holding a baby?

They always turn out blurry from him shaking them.

How does a witch make scrambled eggs?

She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright.

Michael J. Fox Jokes More Michael J. Fox Jokes

How does Michael J. Fox deal with his Parkinson's disease?

He just shakes it off.

What did Michael J. Fox's dad say when Michael J. Fox tried to parallel park?

Watch the Parking son.

Bad Jokes More Bad Jokes

What's the worst part about being a railroad conductor?

The training.

What's the worst part about locking your keys in your car outside of a Planned Parenthood?

Going inside to ask for a coat hanger.

Ketchup Jokes More Ketchup Jokes

What happens when you mix mustard and ketchup together?

It's must-up..

What do you tell a slow tomato?

What Ketchup

Turn Jokes More Turn Jokes

What was the point in making your car louder, bro?

Do you really want women to turn their heads and notice you drive a 1999 Honda Civic

What's the difference between men and pigs?

Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.