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Zodiac Sign Jokes

How do you speak to a deaf Ted Cruz?

Use zodiac signs

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What's your zodiac sign?

Tyrannosaurus. -But that's not even a real sign. -None of the zodiac signs are real.

How can you ask a Mexican if their zodiac sign is leo?

Julio

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Deaf Jokes More Deaf Jokes

How do you speak to a deaf Ted Cruz?

Use zodiac signs

Why did the programmer visit the city tour?

Because they were handing out guides for the deaf.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What does a quantum physicist tell their toddler who keeps asking "Why" over and over?

Because I saw so.

How many people does it take to change a light bulb?

Is just one of the questions I should have asked before buying a lighthouse....

Coincidence Jokes More Coincidence Jokes

What do you call it when a prayer is answered?

A coincidence.

How Do You Start a Flood?

An engineer and an attorney were fishing in the Caribbean. The attorney said, Im here because my house burned down and everything I owned was destroyed by the fire. The insurance company paid for everything. "Thats quite a coincidence," said the engineer. Im here because my house and all my belongings were destroyed by a flood and my insurance company also paid for everything. The puzzled attorney asked, How do you start a flood?

Ted Cruz Jokes More Ted Cruz Jokes

Why do people take such an instant dislike to Ted Cruz?

It saves so much time.

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Ted Cruz?

Heidi cannot swing a golf club.

Tyrannosaurus Jokes More Tyrannosaurus Jokes

What's your zodiac sign?

Tyrannosaurus. -But that's not even a real sign. -None of the zodiac signs are real.

What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A Tyrannosaurus Wrecks. EDIT: Spelled "Tyrannosaurus" incorrectly.

Mexican Jokes More Mexican Jokes

What did the Mexican put under his carpet?

Underlay! Underlay!

What do you call Mexican food when it gets cold?

A burrrrrrito.

David Bowie Jokes More David Bowie Jokes

What is David Bowie's favourite energy drink?

Redbull Redbull

What does David Bowie do after he gets out of the swimming pool?

He ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-changes. (Sorry if repost)

Speak Jokes More Speak Jokes

What's the most 'Spoken' language on Earth?

Hint: It's not English Spanish.

What did the cat... Say to the person?

Nothing, because cats don't speak.