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How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman?

Look under his kilt, if it's a quarter-pounder, he's a McDonald.

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

How does my football throw look to you?

Me: Like you're good at science...

What is brown all around and looks good on a motorcyclist?

A coffin.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What's the difference between a piano, a tuna and a jar of glue?

You: You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna! Person getting told joke: What about the jar of glue? You: I knew you'd get stuck there

What do you do when you see a floating T.V. in the middle of the night?

Tell Jamal to drop it

Scotsman Jokes More Scotsman Jokes

What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?

The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face.

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's Day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds?

Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!

Whopper?

McDonalds responded by introducing a 3/5ths pounder.

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

What do you say to an art student with a job?

Uhh, I would like the Quarter Pounder with Cheese

Why did the rabbit run out of the fast-food restaurant?

He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on a toasted bunny.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

How can you tell the clan of a Scotsman?

Look under his kilt, if it's a quarter-pounder, he's a McDonald.

Why do New Zealand farmers now wear kilts?

Because the sheep have gotten used to the sound of zippers

Clan Jokes More Clan Jokes

What do you call a clan for chickens?

Coo clucks clan

How can you tell what clan a Scottish man is from?

Look under his kilt and if he has a quarter pounder then he is a McDonald.