How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

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He didn't want to be part of a bad punch line.

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Because he can't stand their song Uprising, it wants him to rise up and take the power back.

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Me: It was a holiday. Boss: HALLOWEEN IS NOT A PAID HOLIDAY! Me: It is if you go as Christmas. Boss:...

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Shopping never causes heart attacks, but paying the bill does!

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He will tell you.

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Bravefart

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To one you say, "Hey you, get off my cloud!" The other: "Hey McLoed, get off my ewe!"

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Irishman Jokes More Irishman Jokes

Why didn't the Irishman add another bean?

He stopped at 239 because if he added another one it would be 'too farty'. It would've been funnier if I could do an Irish accent.

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It drives me nuts.

St. Patrick Jokes More St. Patrick Jokes

What's the difference between MLK day and St Patrick's day?

Nobody minds being Irish for one day!!!!

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

St Patrick Day Jokes More St Patrick Day Jokes

What's the difference between mlk day and St. Patrick's day?

Everyone WANTS to be irish on st Patrick's day.

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

Tab Jokes More Tab Jokes

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

What's the most awkward aspect of bar-tending at an internet cafe?

You have to deal with people who forget to close their tabs.