St. Patrick Jokes

What is the difference between St. Patrick and Christopher Columbus?

One drove all the snakes from Ireland, the other drove away all of the Native Americans.

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What's the difference between mlk day and St. Patrick's day?

Everyone WANTS to be irish on st Patrick's day.

What is the difference between Martin Luther King Day and St. Patrick's Day?

St. Patrick's day everybody wants to be Irish.

What's the difference between MLK day and St Patrick's day?

Nobody minds being Irish for one day!!!!

What's the difference between St. Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day?

Everyone pretends to be Irish on St. Paddy's Day.

What do you call people who pretend to be Irish on St. Patrick's Day?

Counterfitz

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?

Regular rocks are too heavy.

What's green and sits on the porch?

Paddy O'Furniture. Happy St. Patrick's Day!

How do I make a St. Patrick's Day mocha?

He says Irish coffee is the only thing keeping this family together

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Arm Jokes More Arm Jokes

Why did the football player laugh when he broke his arm?

Because it was humerus.

What do you call a man with one arm?

Hand Solo

Tab Jokes More Tab Jokes

Who picks up the tab?

The German.

How to tell an Irishman from a Scotsman on St. Patrick's day?

One wants to stay drunk all the time and the other doesn't want to pay the tab.

Patrick Jokes More Patrick Jokes

Why did Patrick's girlfriend have to go to the doctor?

She had a weast infection.

What's the difference between mlk day and St. Patrick's day?

Everyone WANTS to be irish on st Patrick's day.

Native Americans Jokes More Native Americans Jokes

Why don't native Americans like snow?

We don't like anything white on our land.

How many native Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

About seven. One to change the bulb, six to sing the song.

Porch Jokes More Porch Jokes

How to get a liberal arts graduate off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

How many dead bodies do I have to leave on the porch before they acknowledge me?

Cats

Snake Jokes More Snake Jokes

What do you call a snake that rides around on the front of a car?

A windshield viper.

Which snake is the best at counting Nigerians?

A Black Adder

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What do you get when you cross a pig with a canary?

I don't know but when it sits on your electric wire and sings all your lights go out

What shakes and sits at the bottom of the ocean?

A nervous wreck.

Ireland Jokes More Ireland Jokes

What is the stinkiest number in Ireland?

Farty.

Why are there so many people in Ireland?

Cos' they keep Dublin and Dublin and Dublin...