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How'd you sleep last night?

Son says: "umm... With my eyes closed " Edit: This actually happened btw. Probably funnier irl.

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Happen Jokes More Happen Jokes

What happens if Russians fall from an Afghan boat?

They sue Kabul Yacht.

What happens when I die?

Idk...

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Whats the best thing about being a meth addict?

Only two more sleeps until Christmas.

What did the silly boy take his bicycle to bed with him?

Because he didn't want to walk in his sleep.

Close Jokes More Close Jokes

Why was Jesus a virgin when he died?

Every time he touched a "wound" it closed.

Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator?

He didn't want to see the salad dressing.

Son Jokes More Son Jokes

What did the Mexican fire chief call his two sons?

Jose and josB (Hose A &amp Hose B)

What did the potato name his son?

Chip. Sorry.

Edit Jokes More Edit Jokes

What's the difference between Donald and a piece of fruit?

Oranges have thick skin. Let the downvotes fly, people! You've only got one! Edit: Did not expect this joke to get this good of a reception. Thanks, guys!

How are Harambe memes keeping up?

Cincinnati Zoo keeps trying to shoot them down.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

What do you call a deer with no eyes?

I have no ideer.

Why did God make pubic hair curly?

So we don't poke our eyes out.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What did the polygamist horse get on his wedding night?

A double bridle

What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head?

A tiger moth!