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How do you know when you are too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

How do you know when you are too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..

How high can Miss Piggy count?

68, because at 69 she gets a frog in her throat...

Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do pirates know they exist?

They think, therefore they ARRRRRRRR!

When i go down you know what it tastes like?

Depends...

Drive Jokes More Drive Jokes

When are you going to learn to drive?

I don't think they feel very safe in my taxi.

What is six inches long, has a bald head, and drives blondes crazy?

A hundred dollar bill.

Realise Jokes More Realise Jokes

What did the smoked salmon say after it realised it was no longer ill?

I'm cured!

What's worse than finding a horse's head on your pillow?

Realising the horse is alive and well and how much did I drink last night!

Tree Jokes More Tree Jokes

What's blue and white and can't climb trees?

A fridge with a denim jacket on

Which popstar cuts down trees?

Michael LumberJackson

Swerve Jokes More Swerve Jokes

How do you know when you're too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and realize it was your air freshener

What does a drunk police officer do?

Protect and swerve.