How many Deadheads does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just watch it burn out and follow it around for 30 years.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

Why do ducks have webbed feet?

To stomp out fires. Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out the burning ducks.

What does weed and the Quran have in common?

If you burn it you get stoned

Lightbulb Jokes More Lightbulb Jokes

How many art directors does it take to change a lightbulb?

Should it really be a lightbulb?

How many Comcast customer service agents does it take to change a lightbulb?

Is the lightbulb plugged in sir?

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many ghosts does it take to change one lightbulb?

Zero. They don't exist.

How Many Lightbulbs Does it Take to Change Captain Jean Luc Picard?

4 or 5.

Watch Jokes More Watch Jokes

What kind of movie do mathematicians most often watch?

Rated movies

How to find out who loves you more - your dog or your wife?

Easy. Lock them both in a trunk and watch who will be happier to see you after you open it in 15 minutes.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

What do you do if a purple elephant and a multicolored horse are following you?

Get off the merry-go-round!

Why doesn't Pac-Man use Twitter?

Because he doesn't like being followed.

Deadhead Jokes More Deadhead Jokes

How many Deadheads does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, they just watch it burn out and follow it around for 30 years.

How many Deadheads (Grateful Dead fans) does it take to change a lightbulb?

No one knows, they wait for it to burn out and follow it around for twenty years.

30 Year Jokes More 30 Year Jokes

What do you call a guy stuck in the same job for 30 years?

A four term US senator.

What did Iron say to Silver after 30 years?

You haven't AG-ed a bit.