How to blind parachutist know they're close to the ground?

The feel the leash go slack! (heard this one while listening to some Irish tunes)

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

Why is it so hard to get to know Guantanamo Bay detainees?

Because they're too cagey.

Why were the Medieval centuries known as the Dark Ages?

It was the knight time

Feel Jokes More Feel Jokes

Why does the lemon feel uncomfortable making friends outside of tumblr?

Because it has cis-trust issues

Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday?

Because people kept toasting him!

Listen Jokes More Listen Jokes

What band does Santa listen to while delivering presents?

Slayer.

What do cows like to listen to?

Moo-sic!

Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What has ears but cannot hear?

A field of corn.

Why is Santa Claus so jolly?

He knows where all the naughty girls live. I actually heard this in the video game LA Noire. Thought it was pretty funny so I bust it out every Christmas.

Blind Jokes More Blind Jokes

Why don't blind people like skydiving?

Scares their dogs.

What does the window do when the sun shines on it?

It gets Blinded I excuse myself out.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What do you call three Irish lumberjacks?

Tree fellers Edit: Wooo gold!

How many Irish folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb and one to sing about how grand the old bulb was.

Ground Jokes More Ground Jokes

Why can't the plane fly?

Because it's grounded.

Why does the hipster make crappy coffee?

The beans are always under-ground.

Leash Jokes More Leash Jokes

What do you call a pig on a leash?

Pulled Pork

How does a blind skydiver know the ground is near?

The leash goes slack.

Slack Jokes More Slack Jokes

What did the boy say after the tailor made fun of him for not wearing pants?

Hey, why don't you cut me some slacks?

How do blind skydivers know when to pull the cord?

The leash goes slack