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What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

Mourning wood

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Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

How do you lose 30 pounds in 1 Minute?

Go to England and buy something

What do you call Michael Buble's long lost evil twin brother?

Pu-pu puble

Wood Jokes More Wood Jokes

What is your favorite type of wood?

Mine is morning.

What's a foot long, is as hard as wood, and is slippery?

A wooden slipper

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

What do you call a horse that is on fire?

Neighpalm

What did Anakin Skywalker cry out as he lay dying and on fire?

Patme! Patme! Credit to my wife on this one

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Who got only one visitor his entire life, got banished from the family and still lurks around with hope?

Pluto.

Mourn Jokes More Mourn Jokes

What kind of an erection does a necrophiliac get?

Mourning wood!

What's another name for a casket?

Mourning wood.

2x4 Jokes More 2x4 Jokes

What do Jesus and Muhammad have in common?

They both nailed a 2x4.

What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

Mourning wood