2x4 Jokes

What do Jesus and Muhammad have in common?

They both nailed a 2x4.

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What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

Mourning wood

What was the allergic 2"X4"'s terrifying hallucination?

He sawdust.

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Mourn Jokes More Mourn Jokes

How do you spot a necrophiliac at a funeral?

Mourning wood.

What do you call a sad tree?

Mourning wood

Muhammad Jokes More Muhammad Jokes

What do Jesus and Muhammad have in common?

They both nailed a 2x4.

Why did Muhammad cross the road?

Because he had the right of way.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

What do you call a 2x4 that lost its family to a fire?

Mourning wood

What do you call a Korean girl, who lost her virginity at a young age?

Sum-Young Ho

Wood Jokes More Wood Jokes

How long have you been chopping wood for?

I'm not sure, I'll check the logs

What's a nice guys favorite type of wood?

M'hogany

Fire Jokes More Fire Jokes

Why did they fire Victoria?

Was she keeping secrets? What is Victoria's Secret?

Why did the grocery delivery guy get fired?

He drove people bananas!

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

When Chris brought over his musl*m girlfriend to meet the family, what did they say?

Nice scarf! Must be cold where you came from! Do you guys want coffee?

Why did the black man try to break into jail?

He wanted to be with his family.

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What would Jesus do?

Is an unfair question. He had superpowers. Your lifeboat is sinking. WWJD Well, he'd get out and walk to shore. See

Whenever I'm in trouble, I think: what would Jesus do?

Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for three days.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

What do a Boston Marathon runner and Jesus have in common?

Nails in their hands and feet

Why did Jesus quit playing ice hockey?

He kept getting nailed to the boards.