What's love?

Me: Well, all the women text you except the one you like. And it hurts, so we drink. Sister: Get away from him!

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

How do you turn German beer into American Beer?

Drink it

What do you call a melon that's had a bit too much to drink?

A Watermelon...

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What do you call Stephen Hawking rolling away from an explosion?

Hot wheels (First joke, hope you like it.)

Why do kids hate Steven Hawking?

They don't like their vegetables.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Whats the biggest difference between men and women?

The phrase I went through a whole box of tissues watching that film. is a good place to start.

Why do women always sleep on the left side of the bed?

BECAUSE THEY HAVE NO RIGHTS!!!!!

Love Jokes More Love Jokes

Where the hell are u?

ME: Well...u know that shop where u saw that ring you love W: OMG YES M: I'm catching Pokemon near there

Why did the melon get married in a church?

Because he was in love with a cantaloupe.

Sister Jokes More Sister Jokes

Whats baked every day and sells itself?

My sister.

Why was this in the trash?

Me: 6: Me: It was too good. I didn't want to make your sisters jealous.

Hurt Jokes More Hurt Jokes

Why did the hipster's mouth hurt?

Because he ate pizza before it was cool.

Why should you never shout at a pirate?

Because it hurts their buccaneers. (Sorry it's lame, I just made it up)

Text Jokes More Text Jokes

Why does a billionaire need a Bat signal?

He is in a cave. How does he even see the signal Why won't you just text him

What do you call a girl who expects a guy to do everything for her, make all the first moves, and text her first every day?

SINGLE