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What's wrong with these eggs I ordered?

Waiter: Don't ask me. I only laid the table.

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Egg Jokes More Egg Jokes

What came first the egg or the Chicken?

The egg, of course. Isn't that what I just said?

Why did the Frenchman not want two eggs?

Because one egg is un oeuf.

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

Why doesn't anyone get laid on Thanksgiving?

All the coats are on the bed!

What does a man and a linoleum floor have in common?

If you lay 'em right, you can walk on them for 20 years.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

How do you know he's a peeping tom?

Woman: "When I asked him what he was doing out there, he said 'I was trying to get a Pikachu'".

When someone asks, "How are you?

I say, "5-7-8-3" because they don't care how I am & saying my ATM Code out loud helps me memorize it.

Order Jokes More Order Jokes

Why do you never see a Teddy bear ordering dessert?

Cus they are always stuffed.

When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."

Table Jokes More Table Jokes

What's the difference between an arts student and a table?

A table can support itself

What did the Olive say when it fell off the table?

I'll live...

Waiter Jokes More Waiter Jokes

Why do waiters like a good Marth player?

He tips well.

What do waiters want most after dinner?

The tip!