Why should you never invite a pig to join your tug-of-war team?

Pigs want to be pulled through the mudhole.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why do Republicans use rulers?

They want everything to be straight.

Why did the black man wear a tuxedo to his Vasectomy?

If he was going to be impotent he wanted to look impotent.

War Jokes More War Jokes

How does an octopus go to war?

Well-Armed

How did the octopus go to the war?

Well armed...

Join Jokes More Join Jokes

Why shouldn't you join Alcoholics Anonymous on Thanksgiving?

Because all they serve is cold turkey.

How many moths does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just two, but more can join in if there's room in the lightbulb.

Pull Jokes More Pull Jokes

Why are farmers cruel?

They pull corn by the ears.

Why didn't Napoleon get his wish?

Because he couldn't pull the wish Bonaparte.

Invite Jokes More Invite Jokes

What did they do at the Boston Tea Party?

I don't know I wasn't invited!

Why are Trees never invited to a formal dinner?

They only wear Trunks.

Pig Jokes More Pig Jokes

What do you get when you cross a duck and a pig?

A media circus that focuses on the morals and ethics of genetic engineering.

What do you get if you cross a snake and a pig?

A boar constrictor!