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Why won't a woman sleep with you after a date at Burger King?

Because you have to court her before you pound her.

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Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What's the longest you've stayed in bed?

I usually sleep ON the bed. #DadJoke

Why aren't you mowing the lawn?

Link: It's raining Z: No it's not L: *Plays Song of Storms* Z: You're sleeping with Epona tonight

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

Why don't women work as long and as hard as men in the office?

They do it right first time.

Why is women's soccer so rare?

It's quite hard to find enough women willing to wear the same outfit.

Burger King Jokes More Burger King Jokes

What would Burger Kings slogan be if Jesus founded it?

Have it Yahweh

Why did the vampire go crazy at Burger King?

He saw all that catsup and wanted a transfusion.

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

What's the quickest way to lose pounds?

The UK National Lottery!

Why are shopaholics in the UK generally very skinny?

Because they are always losing pounds.

Date Jokes More Date Jokes

What's the difference between dating a redhead and putting your hand in a blender?

There's always a 50/50 chance the blender isn't on

What's a calender's favorite fruit?

Dates.

Court Jokes More Court Jokes

How did he get off?

It wouldn't stand up in court

Why was the Energizer Bunny tried in court?

He was charged with battery.