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9 Month Jokes

What did the pregnant orange see after 9 months?

The fruits of her labor.

We've Got This Love Thing Down

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We've Got This Love Thing Down

How long does it take for a White woman to take a crap?

9 Months.

Where is Jennifer's husband?

Jennifer is 21 years older than her son Douglas. 6 years from now, Jennifer will be 5 times as old as Douglas. Question: Where is Jennifer's husband? Solution: J=D+21 J+6=5(D+6) According to my math, Douglas has 3/4 years, which means -9 months. Pregnancy lasts for nine months, so Jennifer's husband is in the bed with her right now. Sauce:

What do you do in 5 minutes that you then suffer for for 9 months?

A school application.

Why are men the best chefs?

Because with only 2 nuts, one sausage, and a little bit of milk, they can fill a woman's stomach for 9 months.

Why are men better cooks?

They only need 2 eggs n 1 sausage to keep a girl full for 9 months

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Spend Jokes More Spend Jokes

Why did the kleptomaniac spend so much time in Bed Bath and Beyond?

He was taking a sheet.

Why do goalkeepers spend ages on the Internet?

Because they can't stop saving their work.

Milk Jokes More Milk Jokes

What happened when the cow tried to milk itself?

It was an udder catastrophe.

What type of cow produces both milk and potatos?

Your Mother.

Woman Jokes More Woman Jokes

What do you call two women standing side by side?

Four abreast!

Why is it better to date a woman with heavy thighs during the winter?

Your ears stay warmer.

Black Woman Jokes More Black Woman Jokes

How long does it take a black woman to poo?

9 mouths

What does a black women do after having a water birth?

Flush the toilet.

Little Bit Jokes More Little Bit Jokes

How does a Korean walk a dog?

With a little bit of oil.

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?

He was looking for Pooh. - *My little brother told me this one hit me with a little bit of nostalgia.*

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man bring his bed with him to the hospital?

It's because he heard hospital beds have a high mortality rate.

What is more inappropriate than a 7 year old saying "I drink coffee"?

Her saying "I drink it black, like my men"

Trash Jokes More Trash Jokes

Why can't you trust a garbage man who loves his job?

Because he's always talking trash.

What is worse than three kids in trash can?

One kid in three trash cans

Couple Jokes More Couple Jokes

What did the stork say to the couple?

Sorry mates Im out of babes (its a linguistic joke)

What couple rode a horse up a hill to fetch a pail of water?

Jockey and Jill!