Hemorrhoid Jokes

Why are they called hemorrhoids?

Because asteroids was already taken.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What do you call a nice guy with hemorrhoids?

A stand up guy

Why're they called hemorrhoids?

Surely they should be called asteroids?:

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Stand Jokes More Stand Jokes

Why can't a bicycle stand alone?

It's two tired.

What did the footballer's girlfriend think when she saw him standing between some goal posts?

He's a keeper

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

What do get if you cross a parrot and a crocodile?

An animal that talks your head off.

What do you call guacamole that won't talk to you?

Incommunicado

Pencil Jokes More Pencil Jokes

What does the math teacher do when he gets constipated?

Works it out with a pencil.

When can't a pencil write out a check?

When it's broke.

Nice Guy Jokes More Nice Guy Jokes

What do you call a nice guy with hemorrhoids?

A stand up guy

What do you call the nicest guy in the hospital?

The Ultra-sound guy..... Who covers him when he's not available The hip replacement guy!

Spell Jokes More Spell Jokes

How does Al Gore spell potato?

T-A-T-E-R.

What did Eminem say when his label spelled his name wrong?

It doesn't Mather.

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call the guy who envies his friend's gelatin?

Jello-us

What is a guy who rubs bear toes called?

Rob...wait for it... erto! Rubeartoe!

Asteroid Jokes More Asteroid Jokes

What did the asteroid say when his trajectory missed earth?

I guess I didn't plan it very well!

What type of dinosaurs roamed the Mediterranean before the asteroid hit?

Falafel Raptors. (sorry)

Hickey Jokes More Hickey Jokes

What do you call someone who raises the dead by giving them hickeys?

A Neckromancer

What do you call a dark wizard that loves to give hickeys?

A necromancer