Nice Guy Jokes

Who's the nicest guy at the hospital?

The ultrasound guy

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What do you call a nice guy with hemorrhoids?

A stand up guy

Why do nice guys make good lovers?

They always finish last.

What do you call the nicest guy in the hospital?

The Ultra-sound guy..... Who covers him when he's not available The hip replacement guy!

How to be Like Jesus 1. Be a carpenter. 2. Be a nice guy. 3.?

4. Prophet.

Why do girls like nice guys?

Cause nice guys always finish last.

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Rapper Jokes More Rapper Jokes

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

What do you call a rapper who masterbates a lot?

Lil Wayne-ker

Cause Jokes More Cause Jokes

Why did the hunter scold his blonde wife after she shot a moose over quota?

Cause when he asked her why she shot it, she replied: "I asked it what it was before I shot. But that cow wasn't gonna fool me!"

Why did the thieves get caught after robbing the Louvre?

Cause they didn't have the Monet to get Degas to make the van Gogh.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

Who's there! Alceste! Alceste who?

Alceste to meet him later!

What do two people with Parkinson's disease do when they meet for the first time?

They shake hands.

Talk Jokes More Talk Jokes

Why are hemorrhoid and diarrhea so hard to spell?

Like if you're talking about them, you aren't having a rough enough time already.

Why didn't Sug Knight talk to the police?

Because the g is silent

Bring Jokes More Bring Jokes

How many men does it take to open a beer?

None, the beer should be open by the time she has brought it to you.

Why did the girl bring 2 basketballs to the basketball game?

Because there was 2 basketball courts. DUH!

3 Jokes More 3 Jokes

What do you call a newborn with 3 arms?

Not mine

What are you gonna argue about with your family this Thanksgiving?

1. Minimum wage 2. Police reform 3. Why are there raisins in this, Louise

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs driving a car?

Rex (made this one up myself!)

Why did the guy give up connecting his controller to his Xbox?

He was syncing too much time into it.

Beautiful Jokes More Beautiful Jokes

When a guy texts "your beautiful," reply with "my beautiful what?

Then laugh and laugh and never talk to that nice idiot again.

What is Checkmate?

You tell your Wife, "I saw a lady, looked exactly like you" Wife asks, "WAS SHE BEAUTIFUL?" You cant say 'NO' You cant say 'YES' That is Checkmate!