Horror Movie Jokes

Why do cows never walk out of horror movies?

They're able to stomach a lot.

Everyday Deserves a Joke

Everyday Deserves a Joke

What is the horror movie Quija rated?

Quija-13

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1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

What's the difference between a 3 figure and a 4-figure suit?

1 figure, literally and figuratively.

How many beans are in Irish Chili?

239, because if there was 1 more it would be "Too Farty".

Stomach Jokes More Stomach Jokes

What does an egg say when it gets punched in the stomach?

Oeuf!

What did the policeman say to his stomach?

Your under a vest

Laugh Jokes More Laugh Jokes

Why was the atom laughing?

Because part tickles.

What did they sew you up with?

Cat gut.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

How did he die?

The rock is kyptonite and the man is Superman.

What happens when the Pope dies?

Another one popes up.

Siren Jokes More Siren Jokes

Why were you asleep at the wheel?

Motorist: Your siren lulled me to sleep.

Rate Jokes More Rate Jokes

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie?

It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

Why is Texas the "Lone Star" state?

It was rated out of five.

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the rapper scream into his Easter basket?

He wanted to give a shoutout to his peeps

What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine?

I want my quarter back!

Project Jokes More Project Jokes

How do you project confidence?

Multiply by the cosine of the angle.

What type of wood is the most expensive?

Hollywood! (Made this up while i was doing a project.)